“‘I...love...you...too,’ I said. And I said it again. And I did.” (McLarty, 358) Upon reading those final words, I’m glad it’s finally over. At the same time, I’m absurdly angry. Sure, Smithy achieves his journey and becomes a “hero”, but, honestly, I’m more concerned with Norma. What happened to her? She started out as this independent, albeit paralyzed, woman who was able to take perfectly good care of herself but slowly transformed into this snivelly woman who seemed to hang onto Smithy’s every word.
AAAAAYou could say, “Oh, but she’s been alone all these years. That’s surely to have an impact on her psyche.” Sure, it could have an effect and I’ll grant that she is justified in finding happiness with Smithy. What I hate about that relationship is that we start out with Norma as an individual and somehow end up with this measly side character that we could probably care less about. She basically becomes an extra, an afterthought, to the reader. She is there to supply the money or maybe give some directions to Smithy (both literally and metaphorically) but otherwise just calls him and cries in his ear.
AAAAAWe can even see this in the way the words “I love you” are used in this book. Norma says it twelve times (yes, I counted). Can you guess how many times Smithy says it? ONCE. Where is the justice in that? Here is a woman who spends her entire life pining for one man who doesn’t even bother to respond until he has gone on this long, time consuming journey across the country. When he does finally say it back, it’s kind of stilted and seems squeezed into the novel so that the hero “gets the girl” by the end.
AAAAA Speaking of pining, let’s review just how long Norma spent waiting for Smithy to love her back. The first time she says she loves Smithy is when she is a child, “ They’re not dolls, they’re puppets. He’s Rex. Rex saves Roxanne. I love you so much!” (22). Fast forward to her wreck and her subsequent injury, Norma continues to watch the Ide family and peers through the blinds to catch glimpses of Smithy. Later, when Smithy is in the hospital, Norma writes letters to him everyday and he responds to none of them. What a jerk. I’m not sure why this woman still likes this man, but it gets worse. Even after he returns, Smithy continues to ignore Norma and becomes an overweight, chain-smoking alcoholic and what does Norma want? To be held by this man!
Norma can do so much better, but she continues to waste her time and tears on this man that continually ignores her for most of his life. Additionally, any chance of seeing her as a fleshed out character in the novel is overshadowed by her clear need of acceptance from Smithy Ide. Every interaction between the two ends with her either crying or saying she loves him or both. As a result, Norma is lame. She can’t escape Smithy and she can’t escape my judgement.
McLarty, Ron. The Memory of Running. New York: Penguin Group, 2006. Print.
Hahah Lauren, I like the point you made and the examples you gave and I totally agree! Norma is all about Smithy, but he doesn't seem to reciprocate at all and it is frustrating because you'd expect him to express his emotions towards her one way or another instead of just brushing her comments aside.
ReplyDeleteAs for when they were younger, I would get why Smithy didn't like Norma around him since she was a couple years younger and he probably saw her like an annoying little sibling and didn't want to deal with her. As for when they're older, really the only reasons I came up with was that he was probably a shy kinda guy who didn't really have the courage to go over to her house and say hi to her ever or ask about her, and then later on when his life totally became a wreck, and even to when he was on his journey, I just don't think he realized to what extent the help Norma was giving him (both money help and emotion/mental help) until the end possibly. He was too busy with his own problems (which makes sense), and didn't realize it. But yeah, Norma could probably do better, but she played an important role for being in Smithy's life and helping him through his journey.
I like the point you made, Norma does seem to really like Smithy, but I think it makes sense in context of what McLarty is trying to communicate. This story is about Smithy and it's difficult to focus more on Norma and her feelings without taking away from Smithy and the narrative. The whole point of the story is for Smithy to try to reconcile with his past and look toward to future and move on. Norma is a representation of both these realities, she's always been around but it is only now that Smithy is reconnecting and getting to fully understand her, just like how he synthesizes and eventually grows more comfortable sharing his past experiences and feelings. The fact that Smithy has trouble reciprocating feelings shows his struggle as a character with his past. Eventually when he does say "I love you" it shows his growth. If he had been more vocal about his feelings before it wouldn't have the same impact.
ReplyDeleteI understand that the story focuses on Smithy, and Norma is meant to act as a symbol, but I still don't think it's O.K. to sacrifice believable characterization for symbolism. People can represent something while still being a fully-fledged character who comes across as real. Unfortunately, Norma as a character fails at the latter which I think is what's causing all the frustration.
DeleteGreat post Lauren!I see where you're coming from and all your points are fair, but I personally viewed things a little differently. You mentioned that Norma started out as an independent woman who gradually turned into a weaker character. From the way I read and interpreted Norma's dialogue at the beginning of the book, I thought of her as an uncertain woman who tried to feign independence. She didn't seem very confident to me, and I perceived this as her trying to convince herself and Smithy that she has everything figured out when in reality she is still very broken. Also, I thought that Norma did grow as a character throughout the book, rather than becoming a weaker character. Norma definitely does sometimes hang on to Smithy's every word as you mentioned, but I also think that she learned to trust Smithy and to have more confidence in herself, not just in the idealistic image she created for herself. Lastly, I find it hard to condemn Smithy for ignoring Norma knowing his situation and background story. Smithy had plenty of conflicts in his own life, and although it is a jerk move to constantly ignore Norma for thirty years, it is (kind of) understandable given the context.
ReplyDeleteThis is really interesting, because I didn't really consider this aspect of the novel that much. I have to agree with Minwoo in that Norma wasn't exactly a confident and independent women. A confident person doesn't have to make excuses and explain their every move, as Norma did every time she met Smithy at the beginning. And I know where you're coming from, saying that Norma is being weak by just catering to Smithy's every need (esp money), but from her perspective it's pretty different. Yes, she's giving him money even though he ignored her for so long, but for a large part of her life, watching his family was all she had, and so it's not like a stranger is just asking for money, it's a close friend.
ReplyDeleteLOL. I love how you counted how many times Norma told Smithy "I love you". I do agree that Smithy has been a jerk to Norma in the past (from his flashbacks), however I feel like the journey Smithy went on was helping him become a better person which in turn led to Smithy treating her better. Like I remember when Smithy said "I haven't seen her for more than 45 minutes in the last 30 years, but I already miss her so much" <-- (that wasn't a direct quote but I remember him saying something like that). Like we can see Smithy learning to be a social person and learn to treat Norma better, although I do see your point of Norma being less and less individualized as that happens.
ReplyDeleteI agree with almost all the points you made, but theres also a part of me that kind of admires the amount of perseverance she has, no? Like it does manage to show off Norma's super strong character and willpower. I would imagine the average person would probably become a bit discouraged after the 3rd or 4th unreciprocated "I love you". But nah, Norma is tenacious and determined to get Smithy, so she keeps cracking at the normally meek Smithy until she does get him to show his feelings and say I love you back. I totally agree with you on the fact that Smithy isn't the most romantic man out there, but to each their own? Smithy in general isn't an amazing responsive person, so to quote Maroon 5's song Misery , "It's not what I didn't feel, It's what I didn't show". Great post with great points though, in the end I'm just playing devil's advocate right now.
ReplyDeleteDang you like completely shredded her. Man a lot of these blog posts are about taking a dump on people... not that I have a problem with that. Those posts are the best posts to read and talk about.
ReplyDelete20+ godda*n years is wayyyyyyyy too long. I mean, 4 or 5 years, sure, but I mean 20 is like 25% of your life if you're healthy enough to make it to 80. There's nothing wrong with waiting for a person to fall in love with you, and just be good to them and hope for the best, but I mean this guy completely ditched him for 20 years. Also looking through the blinds is a lil creepy, but I mean I guess if you like the guy enough sure? Also when Smithy was getting fat, and if Norma actually loved him, shouldn't she say something about it rather than sucking up and being like "yea ur perfect man"?? I mean being fat is not good for him - not just obesity, diabetes, and heart disease, but also simple things like sitting on the couch for a long time (which puts pressure in the veins in your legs, causing thrombocytes that lead to thrombosis, then possibly leading to embolism, which is deadly in the corneal and pulmonary areas), high blood pressure (which not only increases stroke and heart failure chances, but also the development of aneurysms) and various other underlying problems. Also with his cheesy pretzels and screwdrivers... she just literally sat there and stared at him through the blinds when he killed himself. THAT is what REALLY PISSES ME OFF. If you love a person, you don't just send them money?? I mean lol???
Also 20+ years is kind of dumb. Wait hold up Norma's been liking him since like what 6 years old? That's like 40 years. Jesus. Half way through your life if you ever live to 80. Life expectancy for women is around a little less than 79 years, so actually it's probably over half her years. That's depressing.
But really though either Norma doesn't know how to love or she's just obsessed with him. Just saying. I'd say her crazy willingness would categorize her as infatuation, but infatuation for 40 years? Nah. Idk what to call it. Infatuation's supposed to be short termed right? Also overusing the phrase "I love you" kinda makes it meaningless? I mean if you've been saying it since you were 6 it doesn't really mean anything, unless at the ripe old age of 6 years old you understand what love is before hormones ever fired up and you're just a lover prodigy?
I think I sufficiently took a dump on Norma. But uhh yea she's a nice kid. Ok really though 40 years did she really not see other guys who are nicer to her than Smithy I mean she does work for an architectural thing right? And proving her self-sufficiency to Smithy I mean like ugh you know what if I could I'd rewrite my paper to change it from "Smithy changes Norma" to "Norma wth"? Or maybe I'm just going through problems myself and had to take a dump on someone. Idk. I think this comment is way too long but I'll comment it anyways. This is more like a rant but on well lol.
I agree that if Norma was really in love with Smithy, she shouldn't have allowed him to become a fat, smoking, drunk. It's also fair to be concerned that she has been in love with him for 20+ years and hasn't said anything. Extremely upsetting. When I was first starting the book, I thought she was over-compensating by saying she could take care of herself, and she was all about the personal hygiene. I was finally starting to accept she had the right to defend herself or feel protective when all of a sudden, she was weeping on the floor, begging for Smithy to love her. At that point, I wished she would go back to the self-defense thing, but I don't know if it would have sounded the same now that I knew it was all a shameful rouse she was using to cover up how she desperately needed Smithy, and was actually really pathetic.
ReplyDeleteI think McLarty definitely portrays Norma unfairly, I don't think it's likely that the strong, confident woman we see at the beginning of the book would be so emotionally dependent on Smithy. Indeed, it almost seems like Smithy exploits Norma's feelings to get money from her, and although Norma gives the money of her own free will, the way in which it happens really deteriorates her image as a confident woman. In the end, it seems that our society hasn't changed much since Ancient Greek times - sexism in modern books by male authors is just as prevalent as it was in books written back then.
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